How to teach counting

Email question:

I have a child who seems to learn quickly.  He is in Kindergarten and is of course learning to count.  We have been working so hard on counting his numbers up to 100.  Proudly I say that he can do that now.  He recognizes them as well.  So bravo right?  But he and his father were talking the other day about the number 12, I am unclear as to the reason, but our son counts to 20 and then says 12…. he counted perfectly to 20, but did not seem to know when 12 came into play, even though he put 12 in the right place?  Whats that about?!  Should I be worried that he is not getting it?  was all our work for nothing?

My Response:

Oh, I  get this worry from so many parents and in various scenarios.  This is the age old argument of memorization vs. learning.

First lets define what each one is:

Memorization refers to the process of storing particular data in to the memory of a device.

Learning is a change in behavior based on previous experience.  It involves processing different types of information.  And over time occurs in a curve.

Yeah, that doesn’t really explain much, does it? 

Your son (with just looking strictly at your email statement… not having any experience with him.) seems to have memorized his ordinal facts.  He can put out what has been put in.  This is good news, not all is lost here.  Please don’t seem so worried.

But you are right to take a second look.  It sounds like he is lacking a veritable understanding of numbers.  He lacks what I like to call wholeistic learning.  With learning there has to be more than memorization of facts.  Sure that makes our job easier, we put information in and we want it to come back out.  The thing is that is not learning.  We have to look at the whole picture.  And as your son’s teacher you have to see where numbers fit into his world and guide him to a place of understanding that what you  are teaching him is authentic.  I know that you already are 100% committed to his learning.   I truly am not asking you to work harder.  I would not do that knowing that you are already a homeschooling mom.  I am asking you to work smarter.  Find authentic experiences for your son to see where numbers fit into his life and show him the value of that 12.  Where does it go, how does it look in many, many different tangible formats. 

Do not go and buy manipulatives!  Do not rush out and get the newest curriculum on this topic of kindergarten math! 

Just spend some real life time with him.  What does that look like?  Well, maybe you are going to soak some beans for dinner, pull up a chair and ask him to count out some for you.  Say you are in the kitchen preparing breakfast, have your son count for you all the things that go on the table.  Do you have  a garden?  Count what is ready, what is coming in then compare those numbers.  Hypothesize about what might come in based on the flower buds.  These are all the things he is dealing with everyday…this is the authentic ordinal math in his life, use it. 

This veritable learning that we all desire for our children will not come as quickly as memorization.  They will not have a lovely little sentence to recite back to the busy bodies.  You will not be able to depend on it to validate your teaching capabilities.  The time it takes for them to aquire it will quite often cause you to doubt yourself during these molding years.  Take a deep breath and focus on their future, not your pride.  Children are sponges…and at some point they will become so full that they ultimately can’t hold it all in, and it comes out.  At that moment you will know that it was all worth it.  Memorization fades and they never truly understood it that way anyway however,  true wholeistic learning remains for a lifetime.

Let me know what worked for you.  How did you get creative with real life math?